Monthly Archives: July 2017

Another broken heart

You went from missing me to showing very little interest.
It’s fine. It’s how it goes.

I work differently then other people.

I try to be selective on who I invest my time in. when I click with someone, I stop talking to anyone else.

But that isn’t how dating works these days, everyone’s gotta keep all there options open.

This is why I have no self confidence.

Because I am never enough, or perhaps I’m to much.
But it’s my own fault. I fall to hard.

And I’m positive I’m cursed.

So that’s it.

I’ve literally given every ounce of energy I had left, and now everyone has used me all up.
I can’t handle the anxiety I get when I really like someone. Im naively over here thinking, omg a person I actually enjoy and click with, this is so rare… and to that person I’m just another notch on the bed post. I always feel more… and I always get hurt.

I know my own mind makes these things harder, but I need to learn to trust it more, because it’s overthinking and paranoia usually proves to be right.

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diving back in

I’ve been MIA over the past few months.
I had a few not so great experiences on here.

But I am now ready to give this blogging thing another go, so I shall just dive back in.
( need to clear some thoughts out of my head )

 

 

I question things a lot, especially in regard relationships.
I’ve always had bad luck.
(pretty sure I am cursed)
I tend to assume the worst in people,
because that is all I’ve ever experienced.
On the rare occasion that I actually click with someone,
I fall pretty easily.
More often then not I am simply waiting to get hurt.
I tend to take things the wrong way,
to see the negative in things, even if there is nothing negative there.
Then I over think every detail of basically everything.
I’m not very good at taking things at face value.
I fear the unknown.
I’m so sure that everyone is heartless and just wants to hurt me.

 

The way I think, its like sticking a thermometer into a pool
(after only having your toe in the water for two seconds)
I need to check and make sure the water isn’t to cold,
because clearly I’m scared of freezing to death.
When really I should just take my time getting into the water.
I can take things slow, I don’t need to keep checking…

Wow I sound insane…

Thanks for reading!

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